Couples
Finding a spark when the fire has gone out
Are you standing in the cold over a dwindling fire because you can’t agree on the firewood? In other words, are you fighting without ever getting to a resolution? Has unresolved trauma, grief or loss caused you to drift apart? You could be finding it hard to communicate, resolve differences, agree on important decisions, or you can’t figure out how to parent together.
Relationship counselling may be helpful for you.
Firstly, you need a safe and confidential place to talk things through; a space away from normal life that is free of judgment or expectations. It is then that counselling can help you learn new ways of relating and, just maybe, rekindle some of the magic from your early days.
Close to breaking point
Counselling can reduce the distress - whatever the outcome. Sometimes there seems little chance for you to stay together. Counselling can help. Talking things through can help clarify what is right for you. If you do decide to separate, it can be done agreeably.
When there are children involved, counselling can help you plan ways to parent cooperatively after you separate.
Some ideas to get you started
Ideas from the experts about what relationship counselling is, how to prepare and make the most of sessions
https://www.couplesinstitute.com/getthemost/
Learn about the cycles of disconnection you may experience when things are feeling very wrong in your relationship, and how counselling can help.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qt4VhRHsjm8
Testimonial
"Our experience with Vivienne was absolutely fantastic and one that has encouraged our relationship to evolve in such a positive way. We strongly feel and acknowledge that without Vivienne's guidance and support we would be in a very different situation today. Initially my husband and I were both extremely apprehensive about the sessions as we felt nervous, embarrassed, and angry about our relationship - why and how it had gone so wrong. I personally was very dubious about speaking with anyone as I had had negative experiences with counsellors/psychologists in the past. On our first meeting I told my husband prior to entering that I would know if we were staying or going within 10 minutes based on previous experiences and within the first two minutes I knew she was able to make us at feel at ease via her gentle yet assertive nature. For the first time I felt excited. It did take time for both of us to really open up because of our own personal issues but she was both tolerant, patient and respectful the entire time. As a result, my husband and I really looked forward to each week. It was great to have an hour with each other, without interruptions, and have an adult conversation with someone we respected and trusted. It was honestly the best choice we made for our relationship and our family. Vivienne has helped change our lives forever."- Sonia and Alex
Families
We share everything but our thoughts
Is there a deep divide between you and your kids, parents, in-laws?
Do you find it hard to communicate and resolve disagreements amicably?
Has trauma or grief in the family changed how you relate?
Scores of families have one thing in common: there are many different views to the same problem. In counselling everyone gets to have their say – no matter how young or how old. All members of the family group have a chance to talk, listen and negotiate solutions. If you have experienced trauma and it is affecting family relationships, counselling helps find a path towards the ones you love.
Testimonial
"I have used Vivienne's counselling service to help me deal with two separate family situations, one a long-term problem requiring extended visits and the other an immediate and critical situation. Vivienne responded to the latter emergency with amazing speed and concern for which I was really grateful. In both situations, I found her perceptive insights, gentle humour, and common-sense approach to be both reassuring and validating of me as a person. With her help I was able to overcome two distressing problems and go on to find new strengths and perspectives that have stood me in good stead ever since. I felt absolutely no pressure or intimidation yet after each session I felt I had moved forward very quickly, as if she was revealing me to myself in a way that I found delightful and empowering." - Rachel